They say that when you meet the One you feel it, deep inside of you, something tingles.
You try to suffocate it because there is no way you can be right, after all the times you have been wrong.
And certainly he is not the One. He can't be, he will try to escape, from you, from commitment, from intimacy, from proximity.
They say that there is a moment, in everyone's life, when you know that you need to fight.
And fight harder for a love, or something really similar to love, that is slipping away, that is not blossoming as it should.
What happens, when do you know when is the right time to start fighting?
Perhaps when do you feel that he is the One? Or when is it that you let it go instead and accept that it is over?
They say that the more you grow up the more you learn to know what you like and what you will never like.
They say that at some point you are bound to find people who seems to be the right ones and are not, just because of the circumstances.
Sometimes it happens that you really wish for him to be the One no matter what and you distort your fantasy to match that desire.
And some other times, there is no way you can escape it, you just feel it.
Even though you don't talk to him,
even though you meet with others,
you have sex with others,
you try and fall in love with others,
even though he doesn't believe you will stick around long enough
to respect his times,
you know it.
You feel that this can't be the end,
and you can't confess it to anyone,
you just feel it inside,
that he is the One
and no matter what life shows you,
something at some point will lead you there
to him.
In the end everything will point to him
and if now it's not pointing to him
well, it's not the end.
You walk down the streets
and you feel some sort of weird optimism...
you don't know how it will go,
but you know that now you carry on
with your life,
your work, your friends
and your dreams,
you will keep on feeding them.
You will doubt yourself
more than once
and you will believe that it is all wrong
and that what you are feeling it's not real
you will curse the day you met him
you will curse the day you felt he was the One.
You will think you are just a stupid believer
if and when he has found someone else
to love.
And you will lonely and betrayed,
alone in this feeling,
naive for believing in him and in your heart.
But.
A shooting star
must land somewhere
or burn out before touching the ground.
You just need to find the right landing spot
and deep inside you will always have
that unmistakable patient tingling spirit.
Because he is the One.
And you are terrified.
You try to suffocate it because there is no way you can be right, after all the times you have been wrong.
And certainly he is not the One. He can't be, he will try to escape, from you, from commitment, from intimacy, from proximity.
They say that there is a moment, in everyone's life, when you know that you need to fight.
And fight harder for a love, or something really similar to love, that is slipping away, that is not blossoming as it should.
What happens, when do you know when is the right time to start fighting?
Perhaps when do you feel that he is the One? Or when is it that you let it go instead and accept that it is over?
They say that the more you grow up the more you learn to know what you like and what you will never like.
They say that at some point you are bound to find people who seems to be the right ones and are not, just because of the circumstances.
Sometimes it happens that you really wish for him to be the One no matter what and you distort your fantasy to match that desire.
And some other times, there is no way you can escape it, you just feel it.
Even though you don't talk to him,
even though you meet with others,
you have sex with others,
you try and fall in love with others,
even though he doesn't believe you will stick around long enough
to respect his times,
you know it.
You feel that this can't be the end,
and you can't confess it to anyone,
you just feel it inside,
that he is the One
and no matter what life shows you,
something at some point will lead you there
to him.
In the end everything will point to him
and if now it's not pointing to him
well, it's not the end.
You walk down the streets
and you feel some sort of weird optimism...
you don't know how it will go,
but you know that now you carry on
with your life,
your work, your friends
and your dreams,
you will keep on feeding them.
You will doubt yourself
more than once
and you will believe that it is all wrong
and that what you are feeling it's not real
you will curse the day you met him
you will curse the day you felt he was the One.
You will think you are just a stupid believer
if and when he has found someone else
to love.
And you will lonely and betrayed,
alone in this feeling,
naive for believing in him and in your heart.
But.
A shooting star
must land somewhere
or burn out before touching the ground.
You just need to find the right landing spot
and deep inside you will always have
that unmistakable patient tingling spirit.
Because he is the One.
And you are terrified.
Comments
Paulo's website lead me here via "Does the Universe know when I dream and when I am obsessed?" as that's the very thing I've been struggling with.
I definitely have some Zahirs... I think I have multiples. A person, and a thing or idea.
I rarely comment on blogs, but your writing hit home for me.
Thanks,
jim
thanks for your comment and compliments...Mostly I write things that disturb and prevent my soul for resting...so..that's why Paulo Coelho hits me all the time. He has the right words. Dream and obsession, I think the fine line lies at the very bottom of your heart. I think you and only you can know that. and after all, a dream can be an obsession and vice versa. The problem is what you make of it.
I too have spent much time writing about the things that have prevented my soul from resting (although I've been too chicken to go public... yet..mostly 'cause I started writing to find Me).
Paulo does indeed have the right words—even if sometimes they are not necessarily what I'd like to hear. But because of him, and through a special person who sent me a gift of The Alchemist, I've begun a journey to find my heart and really hear it—so one day I might know what lies there, not only at the very bottom, but all the way through.
I also try to write about Beauty and Love—Love Like a River—so I might learn and hopefully find some peace.
Perhaps you might too? Might have already, I've only quickly looked about, but if you'll allow I'd like to follow your site as it seems you've written much as I have.... but so much more eloquently then I.
jim
But for now they won't rot inside of me.
Chaos can be "interesting", but I guess I've been ODed on it so need a bit of peace to balance things out.
Things are out there to be read—when or if.
Being understood is very important, there should be no trouble in your case if "One" can read and has any amount of heart.
Me? I'm poor with words, especially emotional ones, so I have to have faith knowing another "One" can read very well between the lines.
Heal what you can is all you can do.
In the meantime, I hope some balance comes your way.
jim a Leo too ;-)
in absolutely nothing.
And he asks his heart:
"Is all this effort really worth it?"
But his heart remains silent.
And he has to decide for himself.
My heart goes out to you:
...my words are mere words to her cause she does not want to listen...
Jeez... and I know about choices and distances :-(
And words are my only option... unless I'm able
to find an invisible bridge—(Brida)—and get The Universe to help me. I've had a silent heart, but I decided the effort will continue even though it drives me mad at times.
As if I were listening to the voice of an angel, I write...a long letter to the woman of my dreams, to the woman I love and will always love. This might one day reach her hands and even if it doesn’t, I am now a man at peace with his spirit. I no longer wrestle with my wounded pride, I no longer look for her...
On the contrary, I am pleased that she exists; she has shown me that I am capable of a love of which I myself knew nothing, and this leaves me in a state of grace.
I accept the Zahir, and will let it lead me into a state of either holiness or madness.
Can't say I'm at peace, a Lion always seems to struggle with wounded pride, and I still look. But I do accept and am pleased even as I flip-flop over and over between holiness and madness.
---
There is nothing more important in this world than Love. Something your One must not have learned yet. He thinks the bridge doesn't exists or that it will fall and he'll be swept away. Your words show nothing but Love, even when they don't seem very nice. Perhaps he'll see that one day.
It may sound odd from one stranger to another:
I love you for your words, your perseverance, and perhaps mostly, your courage.
I hope your writing helps you.
I would have loved to be able to convince myself that it wasn't/isn't real, or just simply that I'm a fool... it didn't work. So I suffer.
So yes, because we love, we can not always find peace.
Find it where you can Anna... go sit by the river and Love It... it won't replace what is missing, but it will love you back. Believe in You and believe You Love.
(sorry... you got my soapbox out... lemme git down now)
For various reasons, they choose to ignore, but there's only so much you can do.
YES... treasure your heart! Yes it hurts and it suffers... believe me I know all too well.
But as you say, it is all you have in the end. In the end it's the greatest thing you can ever have. Yes it wants to be shared, thus the pain when it can not, but if you are the words I've read so far, you've a heart that should never be allowed to die.
I poked around and see you read Brida, no surprise there ;-)
So you know of the possibility of encountering more then one soulmate in a lifetime (a shock to me when I read that). That doesn't ease much pain today, but you must keep your heart alive and well, otherwise you'll miss seeing that special light... and of course the 1st might wake up one day.
"At some point in our lives, we all meet our Soul Mate and recognize him or her," he went on. "If I were not a Teacher [which a someOne must not be] and couldn't see the point of light above your left shoulder, it would take a little longer for me to accept you, but you would fight for me, and one day I would see the special light in your eyes."
Keep building that bridge, don't wait for help, make sure it's strong. Be sure it's there when it's really needed.
I don't like the word "obsession" btw. It always sounded negative to me. So I was happy to learn about Zahirs.... they are there, we can't ignore them, yet we can choose for them to go one way or the other (although mine flips sides daily... sometimes several times a day).
If writing gives you comfort, keep at it, don't worry what anyone else might think.
(although I think it is eloquent.. and you inspire me to spout off too much probably).
If you believe what you say you believe, that's what matters.
Yes, our Zahirs come and go several times every day and they are painful to bear, I have come to think I can't avoid it anyway, I am bound to be divided.
Thanks for being here anyway :)
I believe you believe, but I wonder—I hear you though—if one believes, no one can prove her (or him) wrong but herself(?) Yet this believer also could say the same as you did. Yes things are tough.
I give up daily, but then I come back for more anyway. Why would one keep coming back for more pain?? I have no answer. I guess that's one reason I began writing. I guess I decided to accept the fact that I will suffer. So I write about it to get it out of my head. But I apparently also decided that I couldn't let the suffering take total control. So I went on a search for Beauty. Beauty that I can touch, and Beauty that I can not. (The Bridge appears) I can't touch it, but I can feel it. And when those moments come, also appears something else that can be painful—LOVE. Sometimes I say, "GO AWAY! You've already torn my heart right down the middle." But in the end, regardless of pain and suffering, I am not ready to give up. The Love I want to give so much doesn't seem to be wanted. But I can't go on with a damaged heart. So I try to Love Me and Love whatever Beauty shows itself to me... your words are Beautiful, so I Love them even if they come from a heart that is suffering. Don't give up on what you believe, don't give up on your heart Anna. It will let you know it suffers and will make you suffer too, but you can't live without your heart. You Love so you will suffer for it sometimes. (Sucks doesn't it?) Just believe it won't suffer forever! If anything, it's telling you how much you really do Love. And it will be happy again one day.
I had just written a sentence about a Bridge yesterday... took a break and saw you had just written about a Bridge too. Coincidence I wondered? I went back and realized my entire post was about a Bridge, even though not as pretty as yours. Inspiration inspires inspiration it seems :-)
Thanks for the compliment after your quick peek :-) You're welcome to comment there if you desire. I'll probably keep writing... look how much I've done here!!! I better stop, I'm afraid I'm taking over your page.... sorry about that. You don't need to leave it here :-O
Thank You for being here, and thanks for allowing me to visit as well.
I was going to suggest you delete it, but thanks.
I'll need to keep my "questioning" somewhere else in the future ;-)
Have a nice weekend!
It all might come spilling out from so many years of being concise.